Well my TMA is not going very well. Nothing is inspiring me and im in a mood because its so cold and dark outside. i used to like the winter but Im really not enjoying it at all this year.
With my TMA (assignment) due in tomorrow, im just going to have to send in the rubbish I have produced. I did write a second one but even that wasn't any good.
sorry I haven't bin on any blogs recently, just snowed under trying to sort this course stuff out. All the exercises I have done turned out brilliantly only for the assignment to turn out rubbish. Im not too bothered about the marks for it, I would rather have known that i had produced a good quality piece of writing instead.
1 November 2007
28 October 2007
did you see that
In the last post I put 'because i WAS agoraphobic', you see, my thinking has changed without me even knowing it. Lets hope this is the way forward.
changes
well I did spend 15 mins writing something only to press send and get the 'cant display page message'. Turned out my modem wanted a little break and didn't tell me. So I lost what I wrote, but never mind.
I have changed the 'about me' profile section. It used to say that I was agoraphobic, but I didn't like having that there. The thing about labels is you start living by them. Its like when my parents tell people that I didn't come with them because I was agoraphobic, really its because I would be bored stupid and wouldn't be the slightest bit interested going. That's why I don't like the term, it gets used for everything and takes over. so i wont be using that label. Hope this makes sense, it does to me.
I have changed the 'about me' profile section. It used to say that I was agoraphobic, but I didn't like having that there. The thing about labels is you start living by them. Its like when my parents tell people that I didn't come with them because I was agoraphobic, really its because I would be bored stupid and wouldn't be the slightest bit interested going. That's why I don't like the term, it gets used for everything and takes over. so i wont be using that label. Hope this makes sense, it does to me.
24 October 2007
latest update
well..... went to the tip three times on Sunday with my dad. Cant say I enjoyed it. I thought I would have enjoyed it more, however I was surprised at the amount of traffic there is. Only a few years ago you could go out on a Sunday and see three cars, this time it was like a week day rush hour and I am by no means joking. We had to wait behind about 10 cars at the tip each time we went there. Three years ago we never had ques.
I have been trying to catch up on my course work. Got a little behind trying to sort out the garden. Now the weathers so cold creative writing will have all the time it needs. Wrote a little something yesterday. Will edit it a bit and post it up.
Getting my hair cut on Thursday. I'm looking forward to it, getting it done short again so its more manageable. I'm hoping that it will refresh me a little more.
i have wondered out on the odd day Sometimes walking, sometimes cycling, or sometimes bit of both. Now the days are getting dark I think I will need to re look at my lighting.
To be honest I'm a little... out of focus I suppose you could say. I like to think of what job I would like to do etc and I do have a few ideas, but when I cant stand having people anywhere near me... I suppose the end goal just seems so far off. I find it easier not to think of an end goal at times, I try to remember what it was like when I walked to school or went out on my bike, walked the dog etc, when I was younger. I try and think of how I used to be. I want to enjoy the outdoors. How can a modern lifestyle be so good when it makes so many people like me? There are thousands of people with anxiety, depression, social problems..... I have to say that I blame it on how we live. Everything is too fast, too demanding and if you cant keep up then your forgotten about. People go to work to try and keep a roof over there head, to pay off the mortgage that's 8 times there wadge. Why cant people be allowed to enjoy work anymore? to enjoy life. Life is such a precious thing that gets taken for granted.
I think I'm done rambling now, it just really gets to me.
I have been trying to catch up on my course work. Got a little behind trying to sort out the garden. Now the weathers so cold creative writing will have all the time it needs. Wrote a little something yesterday. Will edit it a bit and post it up.
Getting my hair cut on Thursday. I'm looking forward to it, getting it done short again so its more manageable. I'm hoping that it will refresh me a little more.
i have wondered out on the odd day Sometimes walking, sometimes cycling, or sometimes bit of both. Now the days are getting dark I think I will need to re look at my lighting.
To be honest I'm a little... out of focus I suppose you could say. I like to think of what job I would like to do etc and I do have a few ideas, but when I cant stand having people anywhere near me... I suppose the end goal just seems so far off. I find it easier not to think of an end goal at times, I try to remember what it was like when I walked to school or went out on my bike, walked the dog etc, when I was younger. I try and think of how I used to be. I want to enjoy the outdoors. How can a modern lifestyle be so good when it makes so many people like me? There are thousands of people with anxiety, depression, social problems..... I have to say that I blame it on how we live. Everything is too fast, too demanding and if you cant keep up then your forgotten about. People go to work to try and keep a roof over there head, to pay off the mortgage that's 8 times there wadge. Why cant people be allowed to enjoy work anymore? to enjoy life. Life is such a precious thing that gets taken for granted.
I think I'm done rambling now, it just really gets to me.
15 October 2007
the latest
Well today I finished preparing the soil down the side of our house. I have previously dug out about 5 inch's of soil, put down a weed liner (stops the weeds growing through, we have problems with one which roots very deeply). So today I finished putting the last bit of soil on. Will hopefully tomorrow put the seed on (although its supposed to rain in the morning so will have to see how the soil is). We are having meadow grass which is a mixture of grasses and wild flowers.
Went for a little walk after dinner. Had some young people drive past in a mini. Why is it young people have to use there horn? I almost jumped out of my skin but thankfully stayed calm... very calm for me.
I'm now trying to decide how I want my hair done, will try and get it cut next week if the hairdressers free (and if I have any money).
Got a book today on face toning. says it works in three to four weeks so I will post before and after photos up in a few weeks. Hope it does work. Want to get some arm weights too.
Went for a little walk after dinner. Had some young people drive past in a mini. Why is it young people have to use there horn? I almost jumped out of my skin but thankfully stayed calm... very calm for me.
I'm now trying to decide how I want my hair done, will try and get it cut next week if the hairdressers free (and if I have any money).
Got a book today on face toning. says it works in three to four weeks so I will post before and after photos up in a few weeks. Hope it does work. Want to get some arm weights too.
14 October 2007
Course explained and a little exercise
I forgot to mention what A215 was (thanks for pointing it out). The OU course (A215) is a creative writing course. I have previously done a fiction writing course so this was next on the list for me. Sadly I missed the tutorial yesterday. I think I would feel more comfortable going to one when I'm settled in to the course a little more.
Currently I am trying to spruce myself up a bit. Want a few new changes like a new hairstyle, I'm thinking of going short again.
I recently got myself a helmet so I can go cycling again. Went out with it today, just round the block. I want to try and make that a regular thing. I do love to cycle.
there's not really much more to add at the moment. While I do my course I might post up the odd story or something. I will be doing quite a lot as you have to write each day.
O yea, found a bike alarm the other day, thinking of getting one. You can even get a tracking device for if it gets stolen. I know of two people who have had bikes stolen in town so they might come in handy.
I also found a really nice picture that I'm thinking of getting for my room. Its called 'going home at dusk' and its by john Atkinson Grimshaw. The painting is on the cover of a Sherlock Holmes book that I have. Always have liked it. Its very dark and cold but in a warm way. It reminds me of when I used to take my dog for walks in the winter. There is just something so nice about being wrapped up and walking in the rain.... or maybe its just me?
Currently I am trying to spruce myself up a bit. Want a few new changes like a new hairstyle, I'm thinking of going short again.
I recently got myself a helmet so I can go cycling again. Went out with it today, just round the block. I want to try and make that a regular thing. I do love to cycle.
there's not really much more to add at the moment. While I do my course I might post up the odd story or something. I will be doing quite a lot as you have to write each day.
O yea, found a bike alarm the other day, thinking of getting one. You can even get a tracking device for if it gets stolen. I know of two people who have had bikes stolen in town so they might come in handy.
I also found a really nice picture that I'm thinking of getting for my room. Its called 'going home at dusk' and its by john Atkinson Grimshaw. The painting is on the cover of a Sherlock Holmes book that I have. Always have liked it. Its very dark and cold but in a warm way. It reminds me of when I used to take my dog for walks in the winter. There is just something so nice about being wrapped up and walking in the rain.... or maybe its just me?
9 October 2007
Hello again
Ok so this time I really did forget about the blog.
well I have been busy during the last week. my parents went on holiday so I had the house all to myself for the whole week!. That was a first for me. I cleaned the place through and was just about to get a few tins of paint and a new sofa when my parents came back, turned out they hadn't forgotten where we lived. I knew I should have changed those locks.
I have also started the Open Uni course A215 which I am enjoying. However although last week left me with a lot of things to do, this weeks I don't really have enough. I need some physical things to do, I cant write until I have worked off some energy.
Will hopefully go for a walk tomorrow, got to go down to the tip as well with my dad. I was busy in the garden last week digging out a patch. We are putting meadow grass (different grasses and wildflowers) down the side of the house. We have a little field mouse down there so it will be a mouse run for him.
i have ordered a helmet so I can get back on my bike again. I really want to exercise more. I like to feel fit, get some fresh air. But I daren't go on my bike without a new helmet (other one is too small).
Will hopefully post again soon.
well I have been busy during the last week. my parents went on holiday so I had the house all to myself for the whole week!. That was a first for me. I cleaned the place through and was just about to get a few tins of paint and a new sofa when my parents came back, turned out they hadn't forgotten where we lived. I knew I should have changed those locks.
I have also started the Open Uni course A215 which I am enjoying. However although last week left me with a lot of things to do, this weeks I don't really have enough. I need some physical things to do, I cant write until I have worked off some energy.
Will hopefully go for a walk tomorrow, got to go down to the tip as well with my dad. I was busy in the garden last week digging out a patch. We are putting meadow grass (different grasses and wildflowers) down the side of the house. We have a little field mouse down there so it will be a mouse run for him.
i have ordered a helmet so I can get back on my bike again. I really want to exercise more. I like to feel fit, get some fresh air. But I daren't go on my bike without a new helmet (other one is too small).
Will hopefully post again soon.
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